The Power of the Pecking Order

We have an overgrowth of wild turkeys that wander our neighborhood and insert themselves into populated areas.  They are ridiculous birds with very small brains who parade around, hop over fences and then can’t figure out how to hop back.  They can fly, but usually don’t.  They just strut around, scratching the ground for insects, and making a lot of noise.  They multiply quickly.  A female can raise two broods between spring and fall and very often there are a dozen or more baby turkeys in each hatching.  They grow to be huge, so there aren’t a lot of predators that reduce the adult turkey population, or at least few that are willing to take on a giant herd of testy birds. 

Because of all our recent snowfall and lack of food supply, a very large rafter has gathered in our rural neighborhood.  We’ve counted as many as 80 that have chosen to form a community.  They have an interesting habit of sending smaller, younger members into the trees to shake down the berries that have lingered since summer.  The bigger, older citizens scurry around at the base of the trees gobbling up (see what I did there?) the fallen fruit.  The cooperative arrangement seems to work pretty well for them. 

Every so often a member of the turkey community gets singled out and pushed off on their own.  I understand natural selection and survival of the fittest, so this comes as no surprise.  These outcasts wander around alone without the protection of the larger group.  It seems with turkeys, once you’re out, you’re out and not welcome back.  It’s much easier for a single bird to fall victim to predators and they usually disappear after a time. 

Although we humans are supposedly much higher on the intelligence scale, we see this happen in people groups, too.  Like-minded people form “rafters” in which there can become a pecking order.  We’ve all probably experienced the feeling at some point in our lives of being the odd man out.  The ostracizing can be subtle or obvious, but you know it when you feel it.  Sometimes you know why you don’t fit, and other times not so much.  As we evolve and mature, we come to accept that it’s ok not to fit into every group or situation.  We hopefully have gained the confidence to move on without feeling rejected and find where we do fit.  But perhaps some feel like once they’re out, they’re out and the pain of rejection and loneliness is all too real.

In recent years, and especially since Covid and subsequent responses to it, a lot of interesting interaction in people groups has moved online.  Friend groups form over common interests and people who think alike form alliances.  If you disagree or think differently, you become the odd turkey out.  With the protection of our screens, exclusion is easier with the simple click of “mute” or “unfriend” or “delete”.  And in case you haven’t figured this out yet, a non-response is definitely a response. 

I’ve made a number of good friends in the online world, but I mostly keep a safe distance from groups who have strong opinions on topics that I may or may not disagree with.  I know people who thrive in those environments, but I also know people who look for acceptance and don’t find it.  I’ve also been working on reducing the time suck that online platforms can become.  I want to continue to live in the real world with face-to-face conversations and interaction with the nature around me.  I want to continue to check in with my online friends regularly, but check out of sites and groups that have a never-ending cycle of information or conversation that tends to keep us from living the life we have in front of us.  Don’t be afraid to reduce the noise, tune out and then tune in to the space you’re in.  Find your “real life” community, even if it ends up being a bunch of turkeys.