These Three Remain: Faith, Hope and Love

Sometimes while you’re going on about the day-to-day routine of your life, something happens that absolutely knocks the wind out of you.  I’ve had my fair share of those moments.  They come when you least expect them.  They come when life is ticking along and you’re in a good place and feeling like things are easy.  We take those times for granted until something unthinkable and unexpected smacks us in the face. 

This week we lost an amazing young friend to a disease that we are being told has around a 98% survival rate.  It’s good that most everyone survives, until you are the one that doesn’t.  Suddenly all the statistics don’t matter.  All the politics around the disease seem insignificant.  Those of us who knew him are still in shock that a healthy 33-year-old husband and father could be taken out in such a cruel way.  Many of you may know someone or love someone who were also part of the less than 2%.  When it happens to someone close, it suddenly becomes all too real. 

This is not a commentary on Covid, or mandates, or masking, or vaccines, or drug protocols.  I would much rather share about this family that I care deeply about and how hard this is and how brave his wife is being and how even when the worst thing you can imagine happens, there is hope.  Life will not be the same for this family, but they are strong in faith and God will carry them and they will be surrounded by family and friends and even people they don’t know who will want to help and offer comfort. 

I’d much prefer to be writing a fun, feel-good story, but a story of life that includes heartache and deep pain can remind us that there is much good and light and hope in this world.  In the worst of times we see the best in people.  We get overwhelmed in the news by all the bad things that people do and have to look much harder to hear of the goodness and kindness that’s all around us.  What I hear this young man’s family saying is that those who cared for him in the hospital were so compassionate and kind.  I hear them say that so many have prayed for them, supported them and offered to help in multiple ways.  I hear that they have faith that he is in heaven and they take comfort in his ultimate healing. 

Our hearts are broken.  But I know this young man well enough to know that he would want to share a message of hope because of his confidence that came through his faith in Jesus.  I know his wife well enough to know that she is praising God despite her broken heart.  And I know God well enough to know that His love, mercy and compassion are unchanging even when…..especially when life gets really hard. 

Keeping Christmas Simple

We didn’t have extravagant Christmases while I was growing up on the ranch in Montana.  There was always lots of work to do and we didn’t live where shopping was easy.  Amazon would have been a life saver!  As I think back on those Christmases now, I remember them as simple, but joyful and sweet.

Our Christmas trees were chosen and cut by a local logger and let’s just say he didn’t always have an eye for perfection.  We had lots of Charlie Brown trees.  I think they were exchanged for cream and butter from our milk cow.  But we always managed to have fun putting the ornaments on and the finishing touch was the real tin icicle tinsel.  My mom always told us girls to put it on a couple of strands at a time, but after about 10 minutes, silver clumps began to emerge as my sisters and I ran out of patience. 

Our gifts didn’t come in giant boxes via UPS.  One year I remember getting a used bike that my dad had repainted in copper and silver.  I think it really was my sister’s, but everything got handed down eventually.  I still remember getting a Flintstones sticker book and thinking it was the best gift ever.  One year my middle sister and I got matching stuffed bears.  Mine was brown and hers was turquoise.  Deep down I coveted that turquoise one, but no one complained about that sort of thing in our household. 

I only had one living Grandma and she came for Christmas and brought each family member a box of homemade candies that she spent hours making every December.  I always ate the English Toffee first and the Divinity last. I don’t remember ever feeling deprived and Christmas managed to feel magical every year.  It was more about a baby in a manger and spending time with family than all the flurry of activity that Christmas seems to have these days. 

I thought a lot about those simpler Christmases in December of 2020.  I was isolated with Covid for ten days and we were being told not to have gatherings and many stores were closed.  I had hours and hours and days and days of time alone and had to give up many of the usual Cone Christmas traditions.  There was disappointment…..and a lot of frenzied online shopping.  But what I came to discover once again was the magic of a simple Christmas.  We didn’t have places to be and parties to attend because all of that was cancelled.  And once again it became all about the baby in the manger and celebrating with just family.  I spent a lot of time writing and reflecting.  There was lots of time to light some candles, turn on Christmas music, and enjoy the lights on the tree while snow was falling outside the windows.  Simple felt nice.  It was peaceful and somehow more meaningful. 

This year seems much more “back to normal” where we live.  We’re not restricted from gathering and shopping has returned even with limited supply chains.  We’ll be getting together with friends here and there and Christmas Day will be a happy chaos of kids and grandkids.  But I think I’ll carve out some time to be peaceful and reflective.  Simple may be the best kind of Christmas after all. 

Last December I wrote this poem and as I reflected on it recently, it reminded me of what was good about our Covid Christmas of 2020.  I hope you all find ways to keep Christmas simpler in 2021.  You might even find it to be the best gift of all. 

Christmas 2020

 Winter’s frozen blanket of white

brings hush to the world’s incessant noise. 

It sends us seeking shelter,

reveling in the quiet and calm.

Lights split the darkness,

warmth perceived from the glow.

Souls long for this solace,

but seldom make space for it. 

December has become frenzy

that bypasses opportunity for reflection.

Global circumstance has halted

the busyness that has become habit.

Choice is to fight the forced deceleration

or embrace the opportunity for rest. 

I choose rest.

 “All is calm.  All is bright.”

Photo credits:  Charlie Brown Christmas - Charles Shultz, Keep Christmas Simple card  - Hallmark

The Day That Will Live in Infamy

I’m a bit of a World War II history buff.  I think I relate to it because it was in my parents’ time.  My dad was rejected by the military due to a heart murmur and a bad knee.  But I have visited Pearl Harbor and read so many books about both the European fronts as well as the Pacific.  My goal is to one day visit the Holocaust Museum in Washington, D.C.  It was an atrocity that should never, ever be repeated.  I know some choose to believe it never happened.  They are wrong. 

My visit to Pearl Harbor was sobering.  If you’re not aware, the memorial in Honolulu sits atop the USS Arizona which was sunk in a surprise attack by Japanese Zero planes on Sunday, December 7, 1941.  To stand above the Arizona and watch the seeping oil bubbles rise to the surface and think about all the bodies of sailors entombed below made it all too real for me. 

So today is Pearl Harbor Day here in the States.  It’s a day that we choose to remember this somber day in history that turned the tide for the US entering the world war.  If you’ve never read the book “Unbroken”, the story of Olympic athlete Louis Zamperini by Laura Hillenbrand, even if you are not into the history of that time frame, you will find it inspiring. Louis gave up his running career to engage in the war and was captured by the Japanese after his plane went down in the Pacific.  It’s one of those books that you cannot put down or ever forget.  I’ve also read a number of books about the death camps and the survivors.  I’m reading one right now. 

The reason I choose to post today is because this is the “day that will live in infamy”.  It changed everything.  It’s a time in history that has prompted so many difficult stories, but also inspiring ones.  I choose to remember and pay homage.  Our world is a complex place.  Ideologies and politics and desires for power play a huge role in what happens in any time frame.  I would hope that we have learned something from the last world war.  And I pray that we don’t know a war of that magnitude ever again.  To all those who still have stories to tell, I am listening.  God be with us all.  

My Grown-up Christmas List

All the Christmas decorations and Christmas music have come out of storage and will make my heart happy until sometime after the first of the year.  Christmas is the gift that helps me get through the first dark weeks of late fall/early winter.  With all the added lights and cheery tunes, December flies by and we pass the shortest day of the year practically unnoticed.   I love everything about Christmas, from the sacred to the frivolous.  I love the story of the nativity and I can embrace St. Nick.  I love the lights and sounds and gifts and gatherings.  But I know that Christmas can be less than celebratory for people going through hard times or those who are experiencing loss.  

One of my favorite Christmas songs is one David Foster wrote and that Amy Grant made famous.  It still gets me every time. 

Grown-up Christmas List

Do you remember me
I sat upon your knee
I wrote to you with childhood fantasies
Well I'm all grown up now
And still need help somehow
I'm not a child but my heart still can dream

So here's my lifelong wish
My grown up Christmas list
Not for myself but for a world in need

As children we believe
The grandest sight to see
Was something lovely wrapped beneath the tree
But Heaven only knows
That packages and bows
Can never heal a hurting human soul

No more lives torn apart
That wars would never start
And time would heal all hearts
And everyone would have a friend
And right would always win
And love would never end,
This is my grown up Christmas list.

As we race through December and the Christmas season, my wish is that each of you would know peace and love and joy this year.  I wish for you all to know that it’s not about all the fluff, but a humble beginning and those gathered there.  It’s about love and light and hope.  May you feel that more deeply than ever before.  May “Joy to the World” be very real for you this Christmas. 

It's Fine....I'm Fine....Everything is Fine

We all have it sometimes....that sense of worry or dread about things we can’t control.  Some people suffer from debilitating anxiety that interferes with the life they want.  I don’t tend to be an anxious person, but there are things that can send me into a tailspin and usually they aren’t huge or life threatening.  I can stress over seemingly small things at times.  I can sometimes succumb to nagging worry that can cause me to lose sleep or obsess about what “could” happen. 

In my head I know it’s so counterproductive and a waste of time.  Worry does not fix anything and almost all of the time it turns out to be “nothing to worry about”.  Knowing that doesn’t keep me from focusing on worry sometimes.  I usually try to master it with prayer, distraction, or playing a mind-over-matter game with myself.  But I’ve learned over time that you can’t compartmentalize it into going away.  Telling yourself to have peace and trust God is what you know but not always what you feel. 

Today I have to do something that is causing me that restless, anxious feeling in advance.  I know it will very likely all be fine, but trying to push the worry down doesn’t change it or make it go away.  I wrote a poem about it.  Maybe you can relate. I’m working on the letting it come and pass through today.  

Looming shadow drifts in and out

as will pushes it back to the edges of perception.

Pretending works for a while. Distraction has its moments of victory.

It floats around the perimeters of thoughts,

continually trying to breech the safety barrier of calm.

Its goal is to steal peace and create chaos.

Reinforced only by determination to hold the line

and faith that it will eventually work for the good,

it tries to build anxiety and anticipation of worst possible outcomes.

The spirit must win the war by accepting confrontation.

It can be kept at bay temporarily but eventually has to pass through.

Ready your heart and let it come;

accept its threat as something that can be overcome. 

Let its wave build and crash till the tide recedes;

then comes rest and fading shadow.

Another wave will come, but also comes the knowledge

that you rise to the surface, wet but breathing.

Confidence in who you have become is stronger than the fear.

Claim the deed.  You can’t know the outcome, but you can own your response.

Walk through the shadow and into light – it’s yours to own.  

(Drawing and quote credit to Charles Mackesy) 

Overcomers Series Episode 4 – Against All Odds

I’m not usually particularly cause driven, but if there is one cause I’m all in on, it’s spreading positivity in these rather tough times.  So, so many folks are adversely affected by the constant onslaught of bad news we are exposed to on a regular basis.  I spend a lot of time looking for inspiration among the shards of brokenness that we hear about every day so that I can share it with anyone who cares to listen (or read in this case). 

My son-in-law may want to hurt me for sharing this story because he’s a pretty humble guy and doesn’t enjoy the spotlight.  But what he has accomplished in his short thirty-some-year life keeps shining a light on him.  And because I’m incredibly proud of him and find him inspiring, I think maybe his story will inspire you as well. 

Meet Travis Franklin.  He began hanging around with our daughter at the ripe age of 14.  To make a long story short, the two of them managed to date all through high school and university and after graduation, they got married.  Whitney landed a job at Gonzaga University as an event planner, and Travis became an elementary teacher.  After a few years in the public school system, Travis and some colleagues began to have conversations about what would make the ideal school.  Travis began to ask the question, “If you could dream about the best school you could imagine, what would it look like?”  He dreamed of creating a school that he would want his own children to attend. 

Charter schools were not a thing in the state of Washington, but there was interest.  Travis began to explore if opening one could ever become reality.  The road was not paved – in fact it wasn’t even a dirt trail.  The uphill battles seemed like mountain ranges.  The people of Washington voted to allow charter schools, but the political powers that be basically ignored the will of the people.  It finally ended up in the Washington Supreme Court.  First there were defeats and then finally small victories and charters were approved as a viable alternative for parental choice in education.  There were still so many obstacles!  Funding was a problem and even finding a location was practically impossible.  But Travis didn’t give up.  Making this dream come to life was a battle from day one.  For every door that opened, ten closed.  There was a lot of determination, communication, innovation, collaboration….and prayer!  All of this just followed on the heels of his graduation from the Master’s Program in Organizational Leadership at Gonzaga.  As part of that program, his GU class climbed Mount Adams and summited as a group.  Let’s just say Travis is very good at summiting mountains. 

The dream became Spokane International Academy, one of two first ever charter schools in Spokane.  Teachers, parents, community members, and even some well-known entrepreneurs bought into the dream.  There were countless grant requests, building searches, appeals for authorizations, and hoops to jump through…. oh so many hoops.  But this little engine that could, with Travis as the engineer, came to life.  At first it was an elementary school that found a home in a historic (can you say VERY old and not well maintained) Catholic School building.  Next came renting a space in a former Christian school for a middle school.  Then FINALLY the school board found a fantastic vacant building where all the grades could be together and allow for a high school.  What started with a question about what a great school could look like, became a highly successful realization of a dream.

I’m very impressed with this next generation of dreamers who want to make the world a better place.  They are passionate, involved, and determined.  They make things happen for the good of all and they are willing to climb mountains to make them happen.  If that’s not positive news, I’m not sure what is.  Travis Franklin is one of those climbers who drags people up the mountain if necessary so they can reach the top with him. And all in the name of the next generation after him. He inspires the people around him and a whole lot of students to dream, too.  And Travis inspires me. 

Here's the link to a recent article from Gonzaga University about Travis and SIA:

https://www.gonzaga.edu/news-events/stories/2021/11/2/franklins-spokane-international-academy?fbclid=IwAR2Fi_GM0P1cgeQSurXAWO1afOksD-TeJAGFiCvzQpiSbwvfZNyyidzwFec

Attitude of Gratitude

It seems rather unfortunate and perhaps a bit disingenuous that here in the States (and Canada, too) only one day each year is set aside to be thankful.  And it’s also a bit disappointing that it has become a day where we stuff ourselves with food the entire day, maybe watch parades and football which have very little to do with actual gratitude, though some may be quite grateful for them.  We may be grateful for an additional day off or having a day to spend with family or friends. Some families may even go around the dinner table and think of something to be thankful for.  Can you tell Thanksgiving is not my favorite holiday? I don’t want to sound like the Grinch Who Stole Thanksgiving, but even the history of the holiday itself has been glorified into a lovely sit down between the Pilgrims and Indians that lead to long term peace between the two groups.  There was a lot more to the story and not much of it was something to be thankful about. 

My cynicism about the holiday may have more to do with the hours of preparation and the endless pile of dirty dishes than actually disagreeing with the purpose of it.  Of course it’s good to have a day to express gratitude for all our blessings.  It seems to me, however, that if you aren’t grateful on the other 364 days of the year, it doesn’t mean much to set aside one day.

I know that in my own life, an attitude of gratitude is necessary in the day to day to  keep a positive perspective and it has to become an ongoing habit of living. It’s more than just feeling thankful in any given moment, it’s a mindset that allows us to take the good and bad that life hands us and still find a way to be grateful for what we learn in the journey.  We don’t always feel particularly thankful when we are standing in the muck and the mire, but perhaps down the road we will get a sense that we grew through it all and that there was a purpose. 

So here’s my suggestion.  Wherever you are in the world, and regardless of whether you celebrate a day called Thanksgiving, take some time to come up with a list of things that you are especially thankful for.  I already have a few:  family, friends, good food to eat, a comfy place to live, the beauty of creation, health, being able to use my gifts and passions, faith, security, joy, peace…..all the big things, of course.  But also I’m thankful for so many little things like hugs from my grandkids, my journal, photographs, hooded sweatshirts, books, campfires, my mini deck, sunny days…an endless list of little joys. What does your thankful list include? Even if you are going through hard times, no doubt there are things you can count as blessings through it all.  So take a minute, or an hour, or a day, or EVERY day to focus on those things you’re grateful for.  And just maybe Thanksgiving will seem more real than turkey, parades, and football.  Happy Thanksgiving every day of the year!